MEET THE BRIDE

So. Many things going on in my life. Which is how I like it. I am working on a pilot for a show. Working title: Boogie Man. It's a paranormal series loosely connected to another project I am working on about Edgar Cayce. The pilot should be done soon, and sent to some folks who might be able to do something with it.

I would love to hear what folks think, so below is a sample scene. Please, comment on it, tell me you love it; you hate it; that it reminded you of a childhood experience. I am ready for all slings and arrows.  

Just read it.

I title my scenes, as well as episodes. This one is called Meet the Bride.

EXT. CAMP SITE IN THE FOREST - EARLY MORNING

A hip young family are preparing breakfast on their up to date camping gear, dressed perfectly. Beautiful young MOTHER gathers dead wood for the fire, while FATHER makes healthy breakfast. Their three children run around the camp site playing tag.

MOTHER
Is running around like that a good choice? Why don’t you take in nature and its beauty?

The three kids- SCOUT, 9; WYATT, 7; and WENDY, 5- look at Mother like she’s nuts. Father, who is stirring eggs in a bowl, looks over from camping stove.

FATHER
I need some sous-chefs to help with this scramble. Scout, you strip the thyme. Wyatt, go fill the water filter.

Wendy waits for her job. None is assigned.


WENDY
What about me?

MOTHER
Why don’t you get out some water colors and paint what you see?

Wendy frowns at this idea, but walks to her tent to get the water colors anyway.

MOTHER (CONT’D)
And zip up your new coat. It’s cold.

WENDY
I don’t want to.

MOTHER
Duly noted. Now zip.

Wendy sullenly zips up her coat, mutters to herself.

WENDY
I hate this coat.

Wendy trudges towards her tent. A rabbit pops out of the brush, crosses her path, and disappears up a trail. Excited, Wendy runs after it. Before either parent notices, Wyatt drops the water filter. It hits a rock and shatters.

MOTHER
God damn it, Wyatt!

Scout turns quickly from stripping the thyme to see what has happened, knocking over the bowl with the eggs in it.

FATHER
Scout!

Wendy runs down the trail after the rabbit.

EXT. ABOVE THE FALLS - MINUTES LATER

An outcropping of rock above Cumberland Falls. The rabbit from previous scene runs out of the woods, vanishes up a path. After a beat, Wendy runs out of the woods. She looks left and right. The rabbit is nowhere to be seen.

Wendy notices the edge of the cliff overlooking the falls, is immediately entranced. She walks to the edge, looks over. It is a long drop to the water below. Wendy picks up a rock and drops it over the edge of the cliff. The rock disappears into the mist of the falls.
 
This delights her. She looks around for other things to throw. She hurls another rock. She unzips her coat, breaks a twig off a bush throws it over the cliff. Then she sees some wild flowers, pulls up a bunch, and tosses them one by one.

Wendy suddenly gets a wicked idea, and takes off her coat, but before she can throw it over the cliff, a shadow crosses her path.

Wendy turns to see the BRIDE standing just a few feet from her. The Bride stares at Wendy with a look of deep sorrow.

WENDY
Hello.

The Bride continues to stare at Wendy. The Bride’s gaze falls on Wendy’s coat. Wendy notices this.

WENDY (CONT’D)
I wasn’t going to throw it.

The Bride continues to stare.

WENDY (CONT’D)
Please don’t tell my mom.

The Bride steps up to Wendy, looking confused. Wendy takes the Bride’s hand.

WENDY (CONT’D)
Want to throw stuff into the water?

Wendy leads the Bride to some flowers, picks a few, hands one to the Bride, then Wendy runs to the edge of the cliff.

WENDY (CONT’D)
It’s fun.

Wendy throws her flowers over the cliff, turns back to the Bride.

WENDY (CONT’D)
See?

The Bride walks to Wendy, falls to her knees, begins to weep.

WENDY (CONT’D)
Don’t cry. They’re just flowers.

The Bride grabs Wendy in a fierce hug, lifting her off the ground, walks to the edge of the cliff.
Wendy, still in the Bride’s arms, looks down to the falls.

WENDY (CONT’D)
Isn’t it pretty?

The expression on the Bride’s face changes from sorrow to determination. She places Wendy back on the ground, walks to the very edge of the cliff, smiles at Wendy, then slowly leans backwards, falling over the cliff into the falls below.

Wendy cautiously makes her way to the edge of the cliff and looks over.

All she can see is the roaring waterfall, fierce and magnificent.

Wendy turns away from the falls.

The Bride is standing at the edge of the woods, just as before, staring at Wendy.
 
 
That's it. I hope you dig it.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

WAIT UNTIL DARK, THEN GET YOURSELF TO THE FAC

FAC PUTS IT TOGETHER PERFECTLY

9 TO 5 AT THE FAC A FREAKIN' HOOT!