I EVEN SAW A GHOST

Well, it's almost 2023. How the hell did that happen? Didn't I just arrive in NYC fresh from college? Aren't I still a student at San Jose State? Aren't we all still living every moment of our lives, from as far back as our memories can travel, to now? 

What is going on here?

I have no idea. But, if I do indeed exists and this isn't all some sort of strange dream, then things are good. Life is fine and dandy. And since it is almost the end of the year, it is time for a little evaluation of the past year, of where I went, where I'm heading, and all that.

Isn't that what we all do? 

So, this year. 

I think I directed a few plays. And by a few, I mean a lot. Wedding singer. Wizard of Oz. A Midsummer Night's Dream. Rocky Horror Show. The Lightning Thief. SpongeBob Squarepants. The Addams Family. 

I like directing. Let's me boss people around. 

I also taught theatre, speech & debate, playwriting, and the basics of life, at places including The Denver Center for the Performing Arts; The Logan School for Creative Learning; and Reel Kids. 

I like teaching. Let's me boss people around.

I also wrote. Mostly worked on Lunatics and Assholes, a pilot for a show that is sort of a paranormal metaphor for the past few years. And also worked on Out of the Past. That's more fantasy, another pilot that's a monster of the week kind of thing, which I am digging immensely.

I like writing. Let's me boss my little made up worlds around.

I suppose I like to boss.

Keeps me off the streets. 

I also traveled quite a bit. California. New York. Wisconsin. Texas. Avalanche Ranch here in Colorado. Traveling, I think, is necessary in this life. Even if it's just a day long road trip to some town a few hours from where you live. You need to see something you don't see every day. Eat somewhere you've never eaten at before. Talk to a stranger. Look at mountain. Take a walk in a city you don't know.

It fills the soul. 

Also went to a wedding in upstate New York. That was amazing. Weddings are another time when we all reflect on ourselves, where we've been, what we've done, and all that, but through the lens of our relationships. 

And also where we stay up late dancing and laughing and having the time of our lives.

I always think of that line from Fiddler on the Roof. It takes a wedding to make us say let's live another day.

I say let's live another ten thousand or more. 

Let's just live. 

Let's travel and write and do what we love and talk to each other more and try to forgive and be forgiven, to hug more often, to be kinder when we talk about movies we didn't like, or a meal that maybe didn't go off as well as we had hoped.

The world is in a constant state of flux. 

Let's be cool with that. 

Also, I saw a ghost this year.

This is the second time I can say for sure I saw one. I wrote about the first one here: 

https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/7891430757253929065/770461654933686503

The one I saw this year was during the Austin Film Festival, which is a thing I love and plan on doing every year for the rest of my life. Just fantastic. Anyway. I was watching the film The Lost King, which I really enjoyed, when I noticed a tall figure out of the corner of my eye, standing in the aisle, like they were waiting to enter the row and find a seat. I turned to see them better, and nobody was there. About half an hour later, I saw the same person out of the corner of my eye yet again. And again, when I turned to look, nobody was there. And then, a little later, I saw someone in white, tall, clearly walking up the aisle towards me. 

And then they vanished. 

Now, it was dark, and the theatre was packed, and I figured maybe I was mistaken. 

But then I figured "No". 

I saw something. 

When the movie was over, I found the manager, and asked, feeling a bit ridiculous, if the theatre was haunted. 

She smiled this knowing smile, and asked me what had happened. When I told her, she informed me that things happen there from time to time, and that yes, the theatre was indeed haunted.

I shouldn't have been too surprised. I had some kind of mojo going during the festival. Things kept happening to me that didn't seem real. I was on a live podcast and somehow got a room full of hundreds of screenwriters to spontaneously start chanting "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly!" over and over. I met some shockingly cool and distinguished members of the industry. And I made some great friends. All in a matter of days.

You can here that podcast, which was an episode of the excellent ScriptNotes, here:

https://johnaugust.com/2022/live-at-the-austin-film-festival-2022

I think, to a large extent, my whole year was like that. Full of wonder and magic, friends and family, and a bit of the paranormal.

So. Happy New Year. God bless... Us. 

Everyone.

Here's to more blog entries, and screenplays, and shows produced.

To life.

MEET THE BRIDE

So. Many things going on in my life. Which is how I like it. I am working on a pilot for a show. Working title: Boogie Man. It's a paranormal series loosely connected to another project I am working on about Edgar Cayce. The pilot should be done soon, and sent to some folks who might be able to do something with it.

I would love to hear what folks think, so below is a sample scene. Please, comment on it, tell me you love it; you hate it; that it reminded you of a childhood experience. I am ready for all slings and arrows.  

Just read it.

I title my scenes, as well as episodes. This one is called Meet the Bride.

EXT. CAMP SITE IN THE FOREST - EARLY MORNING

A hip young family are preparing breakfast on their up to date camping gear, dressed perfectly. Beautiful young MOTHER gathers dead wood for the fire, while FATHER makes healthy breakfast. Their three children run around the camp site playing tag.

MOTHER

Is running around like that a good choice? Why don’t you take in nature and its beauty?

The three kids- SCOUT, 9; WYATT, 7; and WENDY, 5- look at Mother like she’s nuts. Father, who is stirring eggs in a bowl, looks over from camping stove.

FATHER

I need some sous-chefs to help with this scramble. Scout, you strip the thyme. Wyatt, go fill the water filter.

Wendy waits for her job. None is assigned.

WENDY

What about me?

MOTHER

Why don’t you get out some water colors and paint what you see?

Wendy frowns at this idea, but walks to her tent to get the water colors anyway.

MOTHER (CONT’D)

And zip up your new coat. It’s cold.

WENDY

I don’t want to.

MOTHER

Duly noted. Now zip.

Wendy sullenly zips up her coat, mutters to herself.

WENDY

I hate this coat.

Wendy trudges towards her tent. A rabbit pops out of the brush, crosses her path, and disappears up a trail. Excited, Wendy runs after it. Before either parent notices, Wyatt drops the water filter. It hits a rock and shatters.

MOTHER

God damn it, Wyatt!

Scout turns quickly from stripping the thyme to see what has happened, knocking over the bowl with the eggs in it.

FATHER

Scout!

Wendy runs down the trail after the rabbit.

EXT. ABOVE THE FALLS - MINUTES LATER

An outcropping of rock above Cumberland Falls. The rabbit from previous scene runs out of the woods, vanishes up a path. After a beat, Wendy runs out of the woods. She looks left and right. The rabbit is nowhere to be seen.

Wendy notices the edge of the cliff overlooking the falls, is immediately entranced. She walks to the edge, looks over. It is a long drop to the water below. Wendy picks up a rock and drops it over the edge of the cliff. The rock disappears into the mist of the falls.

 
This delights her. She looks around for other things to throw. She hurls another rock. She unzips her coat, breaks a twig off a bush throws it over the cliff. Then she sees some wild flowers, pulls up a bunch, and tosses them one by one.

Wendy suddenly gets a wicked idea, and takes off her coat, but before she can throw it over the cliff, a shadow crosses her path.

Wendy turns to see the BRIDE standing just a few feet from her. The Bride stares at Wendy with a look of deep sorrow.

WENDY

Hello.

The Bride continues to stare at Wendy. The Bride’s gaze falls on Wendy’s coat. Wendy notices this.

WENDY (CONT’D)

I wasn’t going to throw it.

The Bride continues to stare.

WENDY (CONT’D)

Please don’t tell my mom.

The Bride steps up to Wendy, looking confused. Wendy takes the Bride’s hand.

WENDY (CONT’D)

Want to throw stuff into the water?

Wendy leads the Bride to some flowers, picks a few, hands one to the Bride, then Wendy runs to the edge of the cliff.

WENDY (CONT’D)

It’s fun.

Wendy throws her flowers over the cliff, turns back to the Bride.

WENDY (CONT’D)

See?

The Bride walks to Wendy, falls to her knees, begins to weep.

WENDY (CONT’D)

Don’t cry. They’re just flowers.

The Bride grabs Wendy in a fierce hug, lifting her off the ground, walks to the edge of the cliff.
Wendy, still in the Bride’s arms, looks down to the falls.

WENDY (CONT’D)

Isn’t it pretty?

The expression on the Bride’s face changes from sorrow to determination. She places Wendy back on the ground, walks to the very edge of the cliff, smiles at Wendy, then slowly leans backwards, falling over the cliff into the falls below.

Wendy cautiously makes her way to the edge of the cliff and looks over.

All she can see is the roaring waterfall, fierce and magnificent.

Wendy turns away from the falls.

The Bride is standing at the edge of the woods, just as before, staring at Wendy.

 

 

That's it. I hope you dig it.

STILL SHE HAUNTS ME, PHANTOMWISE

Phantomwise. What a cool word. Thanks, Lewis Carroll. Or is it Mr. Dodgson? Whomever you are, your brain was superb. And I am haunted by many things, phantomwise. You can tell, if you read most of my stuff. I have all these people and places and songs and memories running rampant in my head, like some mad tribe of loonies- and whenever I am writing, they leap out of my head, escaped convicts wrongfully imprisoned in my mind. I don't know if that's true for everyone, but it's certainly true for me. If you come to the reading tonight of my latest play, APRIL'S FOOL, at the Fine Arts Center in Colorado Springs, you'll see what I mean. It's at 7:30, and tickets are only $5. So what's you're excuse? The only person I am giving a hall pass to for missing tonight is my good friend Timothy McCracken, and that is because he is appearing in the Curious Theatre's God of Carnage- which by all accounts rocks, and you should all go see. (just don't see it tonight- come see my reading tonight)

So, since the play has so many phantoms, I thought I'd tell you about the one time I ever saw a ghost. Well, two ghosts, really. It was long ago and far away in the land called New York City. I was living on the upper east side, in this apartment that was given the name Castle Von Doom by the great Vinnie Penna. Lots of crazy things happened there- parties, people, moments in time that are part of the make up of a lot of people. It was this split level apartment with one true bedroom, and its own backyard, which is beyond rare in NYC. At one time or another, over twenty artists have lived there. When I met the ghosts, I was splitting the downstairs area with my brother Jerry. One night, Jerry was snoring loud enough to raise the dead- which seems to not be a figure of speech but what actually happened. I was laying in bed, yelling at him to please stop snoring. It was somewhere near 3 am. All of a sudden, I felt very calm, and sort of other-worldly. I can't really describe exactly what it was like- a sort of quiet feeling, as if I was watching what was happening to me from far away. There was a spiral stairway in the apartment, and something was moving on it. I turned, and saw a young girl, maybe 8 or 9 years old, and a little boy, maybe 5 or 6, coming down the stairs. They stopped at the bottom of the stairs, the girl in front and the boy peeking out from behind her. We looked at each other for what seemed like a very long time, and then the girl spoke. "Don't be afraid", she said. "We just want you to know we are here. And there are many of us." She seemed very at peace. The boy did not. He looked kind of crazy- the crazy that happens to people who have had very bad things happen to them. I got the sense they were brother and sister. But I don't know. Then the girl said "We want to show you". And I was- well, given a vision. It was weird. I was still sitting in my bed, but they were showing me this huge room, full of people frozen in these strange positions. When I say the room was huge, I mean somewhere between a ball room and Grand Central Station. I can still see, clearly, this one lady frozen in emotion- either laughing or crying. Ever notice how similar the two are? Then, just as quickly, the vision was gone, and I was again sitting in my bed, and the two children were standing at the bottom of the stairs. Then they walked up the stairs, and sort of vanished as they climbed. And then I freaked out. I woke my brother up, who somehow slept through the entire thing.

I did not sleep that night.

So maybe I'm crazy. But that happened.

Come see the reading tonight and ask me about it. Again, it's at 7:30, at the Fine Arts Center in Colorado Springs.

FINDING BIGFOOT

I am a geek- always have been, always will be.  I love Star Wars, and Lord of the Rings, and played Dungeons & Dragons a lot in high school.  I read comic books at the book store- and I mean comic books, as opposed to graphic novels (which I also read).  I always check to see what's on Discovery, History, Science and such in the hopes that some paranormal show will be on.  Sometimes I call myself a nerdling- part nerd, part halfling, all geek.  I don't know why, I just know that it is so.

Of late, one of my favorite shows to watch is Finding Bigfoot, a sort of reality show that I think might secretly be the latest product from Christopher Guest, the genius who gave us Waiting for Guffman.  It just seems a little too weird, and the people a little...well, let's just say they strain credulity.

The show follows the adventures of a supposedly real life field team for BFRO- which stands for Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization.  There are four researchers on the team, and they go from town to town, investigating sightings of Sasquatch, aka Bigfoot, or as they like to call him on the show, Squatch- which sounds to me like something that happens to you after eating too much spicy food.  "Are you ok in there?"  "No, I got a bad case of Squatch".  "Well, light a match when you're done".

The team consists of Matt Moneymaker, who reminds me of Corky from Waiting for Guffman; Bobo Fay- a big stoner who may or may not be part Squatch himself; Cliff Barackman, another Squatch enthusiast with slightly better hair than Mr. Moneymaker; and Ranae Holland- the kind of butch skeptic who might secretly be Jane Lynch.

It's awesome.

I mean, you do get the eye witness reports of sightings of the big guy, the occasional video of something in the distance that may or may not be an ape man, and all that good stuff.  But the real fun is the crew- how they talk about themselves, each other, and all things Squatch.  There's something sweet, and also very silly, about the team- sometimes they take themselves way too seriously, and there's a lot of bickering- but underneath all are these goofy people who want to find something mysterious out there in the world that can take our breath away.  I like that.

And I do believe in Bigfoot, UFO's, and the Loch Ness Monster.  I even saw a pair of ghosts once, which I will write about in a future blog.

Please don't forget to check out my plays available online at Indie Theater Now:  Last Call; Muse of Fire; Burning the Old Man; Some Unfortunate Hour; and Fenway: Last of the Bohemians.

Now go find some Squatch!