The country is on fire. Looks like the second wave of Covid might be here. One in four Americans are on unemployment, including me. And I am writing a screenplay. I'm taking hikes in the mountains. I'm making my way through the stack of books I've been meaning to read for years. I watch less news, but feel more informed. I cook more, eat better. I garden both in the backyard and at the community plot we have in the Ruby Hill area. I don't feel depressed. Maybe I'm in denial. It's possible. I'm angry at the lack of leadership in our country. I'mdeeply saddened by the gigantic loss of life. I worry for the country, for the homeless, the unemployed, for the sick. But I could be in denial. Because, even now, with all the horrible things are happening on an ever expanding level, I find this life beautiful and full of meaning. I have so many friends who are down. Lost. Sad. They post about how each day is a struggle. How they feel unmotivated. How they can't wait for the world to get back to normal because right now is so awful. And I get it. I just don't feel like that. Maybe it's one of the few bonuses of growing up in a madhouse. Makes you appreciate everyday. Not that my friends don't. Maybe I shouldn't be comparing my experience to theirs. Yeah. That's a good plan. Live my experience, do what I can. Which right now is mostly working the few jobs left, the walks, the gardening, the reading, and right now the screenplay. Which could be an exercise in futility, seeing as it might be a long time before anyone, anywhere, is going to be able to produce a film.
Am I just and egotist? Probably. But I do think, sometimes, when the gods are smiling, you can make something that touches other people, makes the feel a little less alone in a weak and weary world. Gives them a little something extra when they march in protest of what seems to be an unending parade of brutality and injustice. Maybe, just maybe, your art, my art, the art we all make, can help make the world a better place, help lead us to understanding a tiny bit more about one another. I have found this to be true for me. In tough times in my life, stories and songs and comic books and dancing and art have given me solace. Given me strength. Given me hope.
We are in a madhouse, all gone crazy here and someone needs to save my life tonight and every night. The whispers of darkness, of insanity and conspiracy, are blowing with the night wind. I can barely look at the news today. I can't close my eyes and make it go away. Something's going on. It feels like the Sixties meets the Rodney King Riots. Time for another Beatles, another James Baldwin, another Angels in America.
So I wrote a screenplay.
Here's a song. It's Harmony Hall by Vampire Weekend
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